Three months ago I completed and published my first book Counterfeit Supergirl. The book was written to help people (and myself) make the necessary changes in our own lives to ensure that our worlds are complete. From writing the book I found that there are ten rules to live by if you want your own personal changes to be effective. Here’s number ten. If you want to know more…buy the book
Never give up….
You deserve to have your dream. This is also something that you have always wanted, if you didn’t, why start down this road? But this is very easy to forget along the way. At the first hurdle, or the twentieth, never give up. Or you are no better than the people who never started out. That’s not to say you won’t come across difficult times, you will. But it is how you deal with them that count. Remind yourself why you started this, what was your motivation, and what is your ultimate goal? Everyone is allowed to falter but you are not allowed to fail. If you put enough work in along the way, and make enough changes, you are entitled to achieve the dream. This is your life, no one else’s…and what is life if you aren’t proud of It? Never give up….if life gets tough, breathe, reboot and maybe……just maybe…..you will get to places you never thought possible.
Well Christmas time, mistletoe and wine…the wonderful day is nearly here and the countdown has now officially begun. Although it’s often less mistletoe and wine and more road traffic and family bickering. But that doesn’t have to stop us from getting excited. This is the one day of year when you really need to embrace your loved one and let bygones by bygones.
Let’s face it, family is one of the few bonds that can never be broken, because whether you like it or not, they know you, they understand you and they love you….It’s just sometimes it would be great if they could do all that from at least 30 miles away. But this holiday is here to remind us how blessed we are to have them around us. They will support and forgive you when no one else will and that’s something to cherish
The countdown is on…you have only 53 days to remember how lucky you are!
My book Counterfeit Supergirl was written to help others and myself through this crazy and often difficult world which seems to offer us constant challenges. The book offers ideas on how to deal with changing your life, be it your career, your relationship, friendships or simply your own attitude. Although every situation is different I believe that there are ten key points you need to adhere to if you really want to make a difference….
Here’s number one…if you want to know the rest…..you will have to buy the book!
1. Adapt the plan
Sometimes the original ideas can’t work out exactly as planned. As time goes by you may realise that the exact plan is not feasible, or the idea of the ultimate dream may change slightly. No idea is set in stone so don’t be scared to adapt slightly as time goes by. Remember this is about what is right for you, so if that changes, just go with it. Open your eyes to the possibility that you didn’t know everything when you set out on this path. You learn as you go, and your growth comes from the journey. So as you change, the plan may to. Embrace this fact as no one ever became great by staying the same.
Why do we let so much of life pass us by, just focusing on the negatives and ignoring all the positive things around us? You can have one hundred wonderful things happening to you at once, but rather than basking in the glory of happiness (which we should do) we fixate on that one tiny thing in our life that is just not quite right.
I see this in myself and those around my every day. We complain and we get upset about something, and ignore everything that we have achieved. Everything that we love. Everything that we are proud of. Instead what we need to start doing is focusing on the roses and ignoring the thorns. Often easier said than done, sometimes the hardest thing to do is reprogramme your thoughts and your behaviour away from the negative.
But I am no longer willing to let another day pass without appreciating all the great things in my life. If this means writing a list of everything wonderful as a reminder….do it! If it means looking back of photos of loved ones…do it! If it means remembering back to different times when you lived in the moment and worried of nothing….do it!
Do whatever it takes to remember and understand how lucky you are. Fixate on the good and move the bad to the back of your mind. Even better throw it out all together. Become the positive person you have always aspired to be.
Let’s face it…men and women are different. And they should remain so. However, over recent years it seems that many people from both sexes are intent on understanding each other, breaking down the changes and even morphing into one another…
But why is this necessary? As the book tells us, men are from Mars and women are from Venus…we are a completely different species and will never really understand each other. So instead of fighting against this why don’t we just embrace the differences. Personally I enjoy shopping and talking about make up with my friends, but have no intention of starting to have these conversations with my partner. Nor do I wish to discuss the intricacies of formations and line ups with him. And herein lies the first difference between men and women….
Football: It’s rare to find a woman who really enjoys watching eleven men in tight shorts on a football pitch for any other reason than they are eleven men in tight shorts. And yes, I did have to Google how many men in a football team? to write the above sentence. But I am proud of that fact. Ball control only interests me in one way, and it’s not football.
So rather than pretend to have the same interests why don’t we just be honest about what we really want to spend our time doing. Relationships and people in general would probably be a lot happier if we allow and enjoy the differences in the sexes rather than trying to dilute them.
Stop driving yourself crazy, we will never understand how men manage to hear nothing every time we ask them to do something, and they will never understand why we have to remember every innate detail of every conversation we ever had.
Sometimes all you can do is sit back and appreciate the men in tiny shorts
I used to think that I was the only one who could stress myself out over nothing, but over the last few months of talking through all my hypothetical problems with anyone who will listen I have realised that I am far from alone.
It’s truly amazing how stressed we can get ourselves over things that have not yet and may well never happen. But yet we can all sit there for hours worrying over the ifs, buts and maybes.
Have you ever managed to keep yourself up all night worrying about ten different outcomes to a possible problem. Before you know it, you are not only upset and angry about a situation that hasn’t even occurred, but also furious and worried about your day ahead as you are now exhausted on top of stressed?
It is only recently that I have desperately started to dial down the crazy and I feel a hell of a lot better for it. The reality is that there will always be limitations to how much control we have over our own lives. As much as you can keep a tab on your own behaviour we have little power over other people and outside influences. The sooner you except this, the happier you will be. All you can do in life is the most you are capable of. As long as you are seizing every opportunity that comes your way, and making the most of trying to move in the right direction…what more can you really do.
Sometimes to be truly happy you need to walk away from the worry and try and find a way to live in the moment. On your death bed are you going to wish you stressed and planned more? or are you going to wish that you were able to enjoy the little things in life?… that you were able to just live as if each day were you last.
It’s time to close your mind to the stress and open it up to the opportunities ahead of you. Only then can the idea of happiness become your reality.
Some time ago I set myself the challenge to change my life. As constant aspects no longer made me happy I knew that I wanted to really turn my world upside down and make it something to be proud of. Easier said than done. While I knew the changes that I wanted to make (vaguely,) I had no idea how to really make them happen.
It took time, and it’s a work in progress. But while many of my hopes and dreams are still yet to be fulfilled I can happily say that I am a hell of a lot closer to them than I was before I started this journey.
But my proudest achievement of this year was getting my book Counterfeit Supergirl published and out there.
And the book is just that…..how to change your life. It’s filled with my life’s stories. Love, friends, fun and sex! But most importantly it’s full of ideas on how to set the wheels in motion. How to pick your plan, how to start your journey and how to change your behaviour so that your life, in turn, can also change.
So if you’re feeling a little lost and need some direction on how to actually live out your daydreams…just buy the book. And let’s see if SEX really does sell!